Surrounded in Solitude

In many ways, the life of a writer is a lonely one. I sit alone with my pen and paper (or laptop, or note taker) and let go of reality in favour of forays into imaginary worlds. I throw myself into intimate relationships with people who feel real but are, in truth, mere figments. I feel their emotions as if they were my own. Their joy, their heartbreak, every laugh and each choking sob. It’s not a wonder writers sometimes come across as… well… mental health adjacent.

But a writer is never truly alone. The characters I create, despite their lack of corporeal form, never truly leave. It’s true that when I write The End and send a book off into the world, there is a sense of separation and of saying goodbye, but it’s only ever temporary. Characters visit at odd times, usually when I hear a song from the book soundtrack, or when I read a quote from the book, or when a reader talks about them. Every time I hear the words ‘I love this character’ my heart swells and all I can think is ‘I love them, too!’

Which also seems a little weird because, at their heart, my characters are the personification of various slivers of myself – both in their strengths and their faults. I am Patrick’s curiosity, and Logan’s wariness. I am Amber’s love of shoes and Lincoln’s need to pare life back to only the essentials. I am Dante’s hidden desires and Sean’s need to be found. Sam’s anxiety and Tristan’s sorrow. Toni’s flamboyance and Ned’s… well… you get the idea. 😉

So, yes, writing is a solitary process. but I never truly write alone. I am surrounded by all the characters I’ve ever written, and a few who are still waiting their turn. Now if only I could get them to stop talking over one another, maybe I’d get more work done. 🙂

My Favourite Books of 2022

At the start of every year, I love to look back at all the books I’ve read over the previous 12 months and wax lyrical about the ones I loved most. So, without further ado, here are my favourite books of 2022.

Note: I read these for the first time last year, but they may have been published in an earlier year.

You and Me by Tal Bauer
This book was my introduction to Tal Bauer’s writing and it was un-freaking-believable! Luke is a man at rock bottom. His wife died a year ago, with divorce papers in her purse. He’s estranged from his teen-aged son. He believes he’s failed as a husband, as a father, as a functioning human. He wants to make things right, but he has no idea where to start. Enter Landon, the world’s most perfect single-dad. When Landon invites Luke to help out behind the scenes on their sons’ football team, Luke takes a terrified breath and accepts. As they spend time together, and similarities start to overcome differences, the two men become friends. Over time, Luke learns to come alive again. He starts to rebuild a genuine connection with his son. He remembers how to laugh and have fun. And it’s here, in the many places between failure and perfection, that he discovers friendship can turn into something more.

Bad Wrong Things by C.P. Harris
C.P. Harris’ author tagline is “Possessive, steamy, messy love.” This book is all those things, but to the nth degree. It is definitely not for everyone. It is wild and reckless. It is brilliantly written. It’s also toxic and mean and will emotionally pummel you into next week. I loved it. Even when it was too much, and when I got squeamish, and when I thought these two men couldn’t possibly ever be good for each other, and even when there was nothing ‘romantic’ about it… I couldn’t stop reading. Dive in if you dare, but heed the trigger warnings!

A Taste of Ink by Daniel May
I don’t even know where to start with this series. It’s way more out of control than anything I’ve ever read previously. It involves taboos I definitely never thought I would read. It took seven novellas to get from one end of the story to the other (although they’ve now been condensed down to three). Oh yeah, and it’s the only thing I read twice this year. I devoured it whole both times. Zee, Trinket, and Mini were complex and interesting characters, each with their own unique set of emotional strengths and weaknesses. The three of them managed to fit together in ways I never would have thought possible back in book one. Which is, of course, entirely the point. Told exclusively from Trinket’s point of view.

The Sheltering Tree by J.R. Lawrie
This book came in at 1st place on the Best Books of 2021 for the lovely Larissa over at Love Bytes Book Reviews. My book, The Harder We Fall, came in at 2nd place. So, of course, I had to read this book! And, honestly, it was absolutely amazing. I loved reading a book with more mature main characters (40s and 50s). Alastair Harding is the first gay chief of the London Metropolitan Police, and he’s paid a high price to be there. Jay Fieldhouse runs a charity, but is secretly in the Witness Protection Program. When they are seated side by side at an awards dinner, sparks fly and the lives of both men are changed forever. This book was sweetness itself, but with plenty of steam and a little danger on the side.

The Underdog by Briar Prescott
Briar Prescott is the best. Her books are such a breath of real, genuine fresh air. Once upon a time, Anders told his younger brother and sister a little white lie about wanting to complete a triathlon one day. The problem? They believed him. They’ve even entered him into one and hired a personal trainer to get him across the finish line. Wells is supremely unimpressed about being tricked into becoming that personal trainer. Still struggling to come to terms with the devastating hand life has recently dealt him, Wells is determined to get fired as quickly as possible so he can go back to being miserable in peace. But Anders knows this means a lot to his siblings. And as much as he hates exercise, he hates the idea of letting them down even more. Wells can be as mean as he likes, Anders isn’t going anywhere. This book is pure sunshine wrapped in a disgruntled package. Loved it so much!

First Impressions by Jay Hogan
This was a pleasant surprise for me. I’d never read a Jay Hogan book before and wasn’t sure what to expect. First Impressions had me hooked from the first chapter. Michael is a doctor rebuilding his life in New Zealand after messing up his old life in a major way. Josh is the super serious, single-dad, ‘my dog is scarier than your dog’ K9 cop who doesn’t like Michael. No, really. Josh really doesn’t like Michael, no matter how sexy he is. *wink* I was really impressed with the development of the characters in this enemies-to-lovers romance, particularly Michael who changed many of his worldviews throughout the course of the story. And Josh, what a dreamboat. *sigh*

Beautiful and Terrible Things by Riley Hart
Riley Hart has this way of yanking your heart out, tossing it around for a while, and then tucking it back into your chest all safe and sound. That’s exactly what she did with Beautiful and Terrible Things. Gage and Joey meet as children and fall in love as teenagers, but are then torn apart by one violent, irrevocable moment. When they manage to find each other again, years later, both are still struggling to rebuild their lives. The connect between them is as strong as ever, but there is a lot of healing to be done before they can be free to embrace the future. I’ll forever be a fan of Riley’s books, and this is among her best.

Without You by Marley Valentine
This one is all angst and heartbreak. Totally my jam. Deacon always knew he didn’t fit in with the rest of his family. He was the outsider, playing second fiddle to his brother, Rhett. Julian, Rhett’s boyfriend, fits in just fine. The two men have little to do with each other until after Rhett dies of an illness. Deacon and Julian are left trying to find their way in a world forever changed. They finally begin to spend time together, which both opens old wounds and sparks new understandings. Their journey from vague animosity, to wary friendship, to devoted love is handled with sensitivity and skill by my fellow Aussie, Marley Valentine.

It was really hard to get the list down to only eight. There were a few more books I would have loved to include *cough* on board by jay hogan *cough* but only so many covers fit well on an Instagram post so… here we are. 🙂

I hope you found something new to read in this list, and I’d love to know what your top books of 2022 were. Because my TBR list can never be too long.

Books That Changed My Life: Shifting Gears

Some books you enjoy. Some books you rave about. Then there are the books that happen to come into your life at exactly the right moment and give you something you didn’t know you needed. These are the books that change your life.

Back in February of 2016, I released my second novel, Our Little Secret. It was a very exciting time for me as OLS managed to creep up into second place on one of the Amazon Best Seller lists. Which, of course, means I spent a ridiculous amount of time staring at that particular page on my browser. The placings tended to shuffle around hourly, so I had to refresh every minute or so, to make sure I was up-to-date. 🙂

There was another book that hung out beside mine for a few days, which had one of the most beautiful, romantic covers I had ever seen. It had been published within a few days of mine. The book was Shifting Gears by Riley Hart.


At that stage, I had never read an MM romance. I’d read some MMF, and Our Little Secret was an MMF Romance. But I’d never read a book that focused solely on an MM relationship.

I hesitated in those first few days. The idea felt so different from anything I’d ever read before. Like sneaking a peek into a forbidden world. Plus, I’d spent so much on the costs associated with my release that spending money on a book for myself seemed entirely too decadent. But I kept coming back to it over and over. To the cover. The description. The idea. I wanted to know what a true MM Romance was like.

Eventually, I gave in and bought the book. It was amazing!

By the time I reached The End I was hopelessly in love with the main characters. Especially Rod, whose smiling, carefree exterior masked deep insecurities and a desperate need for acceptance and love. Oh, the deliciousness of all that angst!

Needless to say, I was hooked and have been reading MM Romance ever since. It was still some time before I nervously plucked up the courage to pen an MM novel of my own (All the Broken Pieces was my first). But I can definitely say that Shifting Gears was the book that started me on the path to where I am today. I will forever be grateful to the talented and generous Riley Hart for providing such a swoonworthy introduction to the world of MM Romance.

Do you remember your first MM Romance? If so, I’d love to know which book or author seduced you into the fold. Simply hit reply on this email to respond.

Everything I Know About Writing I Learned From FanFiction

I read a lot of books before I became a writer. Like a LOT of books. But it wasn’t until I started to read and enjoy fanfiction that I decided to pick up a pen, open a notebook, and try my hand at a fan-based story of my own. I figured my long history as a reader would provide all the knowledge I could possibly need to dive right in. Yeah, not so much. But the more I wrote, the more I learned about all the different elements of writing. Here are just a few of the lessons I learned from fanfiction.

Fanfiction taught me what I didn’t know. An embarrassingly short time after I began my very first story I started to run up against deep and complicated questions like, How do I punctuate dialogue? I didn’t instinctively know the rules for action tags versus speech tags. I couldn’t even remember if the comma should come before or after the quotation marks. Any and all instruction I’d received about such pesky issues in school had long since faded from my memory banks. Thankfully, I had a bookshelf full of ready examples to lead the way.

Fanfiction helped me realise all the things I didn’t know that I didn’t know. Head-hopping (the act of swapping back and forth between different points of view multiple times in a single scene) is generally considered a grievous sin. It’s confusing for the reader and prevents them from sinking deeply into the emotional lives of the characters. When I first started writing fanfiction I’d never even heard the term, but I was oh so guilty of the sin. My early stories head-hopped so flagrantly and so often it’s a wonder my readers didn’t get dizzy. The fact that I was writing at all lead to me reading articles on writing, which opened up a whole new world of techniques (both the good and the bad).

Fanfiction taught me to love my fans. Fanfiction can be a wonderful place to start your writing career because you get feedback every time you post something new. A short story, a chapter from a series, even a drabble (the shortest of short stories) comes with fast hits of reader response. I quickly learned that reader love is a very special and addictive kind of bliss. Reader hate should be backed away from and forgotten as quickly as possible. I figure if I’m not getting a bit of both, I’m probably not saying anything particularly interesting.

Fanfiction taught me I could write a book. Having a go at writing short fanfiction led to me writing longer fanfiction. Which led to writing fiction with actual chapters, then lots of chapters. The day I finished a 30,000 word fanfiction story (for which I even managed a few modest popularity awards) I decided to have a go at writing a book. I took an original character from one of my fanfictions and gave her a story all of her own. That book became my first publication.

It’s been a long time since I wrote a piece of fanfiction, but I’ll never forget the gifts it gave me. A way to try out something new; a warm and generous community of fellow writers; ravenous readers to delight; and most of all, the confidence to keep moving on to bigger projects. We all have to start somewhere, no matter what skill we’re acquiring. For writing, I will always recommend fanfiction as a great way to lay down your first ink. You never know where it will take you.

Less Than Avid

For many authors, seeing their words in print is the culmination of a childhood dream. They talk about how they grew up reading anything they could get their hands on and making up stories in their heads. It all sounds terribly romantic. I kind of wish I could count myself among these imaginative souls who seem like they were born to be writers. But in truth, I didn’t read much as a kid. While the other girls in school were devouring Anne of Green Gables, I never even bothered to crack the cover on the first book.

One day in particular stands out for me. I would have been about 10ish, and my whole class was crammed into the school classroom for lunch because it was raining (There’s no such thing as a school cafeteria in Australia. You’re either in a classroom or you’re outside). Me and twenty-something other ten-year-olds were mucking around and seeing how much mischief we could get up to without getting into trouble from the teacher.

But there was one girl who sat quietly at her desk reading a book. I remember staring for a while before sidling up to her and asking why she was reading when she could be… you know… having fun. She told me how much she was enjoying her book and that reading was also fun.

Cue my confusion and disbelief. Sure, I’d enjoyed a handful of books, but reading hardly seemed like a good use of a whole lunchtime. Eventually, I shrugged and slunk away, leaving her to her madness.

I was sixteen when my Mum allowed me to read one of her many romance novels. It was hilariously funny, wildly romantic and even a bit steamy (which I promptly thought was gross). But somewhere between those pages, a reading bug lay waiting. I didn’t just catch it, I gobbled it down whole. Before long I was devouring a book a week. Mostly romance, but also psychological thrillers, classics, and the odd horror. Dare I say it… anything I could get my hands on!

The urge to write was still a long way off, and I’ll certainly never be able to claim I was born for this. But I am proof that a love of reading can blossom at any moment. All you need to do is find the right book.

As for the girl who first promised me reading could be fun? She became my best friend throughout high school. We read a ton of books together.

You’re A What Now?

Writers write.

New and experienced writers alike are confronted with two these words on a regular basis. We see them on Pinterest, Instagam, Facebook. We see them used in posts from other writers, in articles written by writers for writers. When you’re not writing, these two words seem to be everywhere. They’re meant to be encouraging and motivating, and sometimes they are. But at the end of the day they also promote one rigid and demoralising idea: if you’re not writing, you’re not a writer.

I’m a writer. I have a modest collection of novels to my name. I have sales under my belt and reviews on my product pages. But over the last six months or so I’ve barely managed to string more than a few paragraphs together. Does this mean I should hand over my pen and paper, or start calling myself an ex-writer?

Nope. Don’t think so. Not gonna happen. In the words of Steven Pressfield (author of The War of Art): “You are a writer when you tell yourself you are. No one else’s opinion matters. Screw them. You are when you say you are.”

Putting one word after another is a huge part of what makes me think of myself as a writer. Of course, it is. But it’s not the only thing. I identify as a writer because I have a burning desire to share my thoughts and imaginings through writing. This is true on days when I smash out 1000s of words. It’s also true on days/weeks/months when my word count is a big fat zero.

I’m a writer because my characters follow me into the shower; because song lyrics jump out at me randomly and must be added to a particular book soundtrack NOW; because I occasionally burn dinner after dashing out of the kitchen to write out a scene that just played through my head; because I make notes on my phone about character motivations and plot points; because I study the story structure of movies and tv shows; because I read books on writing and creativity to better learn my craft; because I have so many characters in my head and they all want it to be ‘their turn’ to talk.

I’m a writer because I can feel the words bouncing around inside me and the only way to get them out is through my fingers and onto a page. Just as you are whatever you feel called to do, whether it be paint a picture, parent a child, start a business, write a song, plant a garden, nurse a patient, and on and on into infinity. I believe we’re all happiest when the best of who we are on the inside is authentically shared on the outside.

I look forward to sharing more of me again.

The Characters Who Sneak Up On You

Toni Fairweather was never supposed to have a happy ending. Even though The Experiment (the first book in the Experimental Love series) opened with a description of his soft lips and pretty features, he was only ever meant to be a throwaway side character. The man my main character, Patrick, didn’t want to kiss.

I’ll admit Toni was all kinds of fun to write. He was snarky and dramatic, with adorable dimples and a deep love of cocktails. But once I finished writing those initial chapters, I never expected to cross paths with him again.

Fast forward to the final chapters of The Experiment. My second main character, Logan, returned to the same club where the book opened. He was determined to find a fling to help him forget his heartache over losing Patrick (yes, it was during that part of the book). Obviously, I couldn’t let that happen. Someone had to get in the way. But who? The answer quickly became obvious: Toni.

With a cocktail in hand and a sympathetic ear to lend, he sauntered back onto the page as if his return were inevitable. Apparently, he’d been hanging out around the edges of my subconscious waiting for his cue. By the end of that second scene, Toni had morphed into a fully-fledged character. Every word and action revealed hints of depth and vulnerability. I loved him in that moment, and I loved the way he took care of Logan when he was in dire need of a friend.

Readers fell in love with Toni, too. Soon after the book was released, I started to get requests for Toni to get a story of his own. Without a doubt, he had become far too bright and shiny to ignore.

I’m so glad I listened to my readers and looked deeper into Toni’s story. For all his surface level snark and tendency to be a bit ‘extra’, he has such a big heart and so much love to give. Toni is one throwaway side character who truly deserved a happy ending all his own.

Toni’s story, Bona Fide Fake, is available now on Amazon (including KU).

Soundtrack: Bona Fide Fake

Every story comes with it’s own soundtrack (at least, it does when I write it) and Bona Fide Fake was no different. This month, I invite you to listen to the music that inspired the various parts of Toni and Ned’s story. I had such a great time developing this list, and loved how the differences in Toni and Ned’s personalities came through in the songs we chose. I know using the term ‘we’ might seem a little weird, but it really does feel like the characters themselves voice their opinions on the song choices, so I’d hate to take all the credit.

You can join me by clicking on the YouTube links below and watching the film clips (where they’re available) as you listen. Or you can listen to the list through my Spotify account, which you can find here!

Let’s get started…

Don’t You Know by Jaymes Young – Every book needs a theme song and this one was perfect for Bona Fide Fake. It nailed the tone of the book with every note.

I’m So Tired by Lauv ft. Troye Sivan – Everything about this song screams Toni right at the start of the book. I can practically hear him complaining in the lyrics, “I’m so damned tired of love songs. Everyone around me is falling in love. I just want to go home!” Yep, there’s my boy.

Dangerous by Hands Like Houses – If you’ve listened to any of my other soundtracks you may have noticed my love for Aussie band, Hands Like Houses. When I heard this song on their new album I knew it perfectly represented Ned’s worldview at the start of the book.

Bite by Troye Sivan – How fabulously Toni is this? It doesn’t hurt that Troye looks a little like our cocktail-loving, dimpled darling.

Power by Isak Danielson – (This film clip is more explicit than the rest.) If I could only give you one song to represent Bona Fide Fake, it would be this one. All Ned’s deepest desires are right here, and Isak Danielson’s voice brings them to life so beautifully.

My My My! by Troye Sivan – (Trigger for photosensitivity) Here’s a tidbit I haven’t mentioned elsewhere. I once had a flash of inspiration for a short story that would have involved a club dancer and a police officer who happened to be in the audience. The flash happened while I was listening to this song. While that story never ended up going anywhere, one of the conversations I wrote out between the two characters inspired the conversation Ned and Toni have while Ned’s tending bar soon after they meet. For those of you who have read the book it involves four little words Toni would rather not say that manage to render Ned speechless. 😉

Vasoline by Stone Temple Pilots – “One time a thing occurred to me, what’s real and what’s for sale… Think I’d be safer all alone…” In my head Ned wrote this song for his band, Fifth Circle (with Johnny’s help, of course) based on his experiences with both Zac and Toni.

Tied Down by Jaymes Young – No prizes for knowing which character this song belongs to. It’s Toni alllllllll over.

Black Sheep by Jacob Lee – This song makes me a little sad, because this is who Ned might have become… if he’d never met Zac.

I Like Me Better by Lauv – Aaand back to the fun stuff. This is Toni’s worldview after he falls in love with Ned. Because life is better when you’re with the one who sees you from fabulous to furious and back again… and loves you anyway.

Would? by Alice in Chains – This is me channeling Fifth Circle’s performance at the Autumn Skies Music Festival in Byron Bay. I wish I could go and hang out with the boys!

Stuck with Me by The Neighbourhood – For me this song represents Ned’s time in Sydney when he was desperately trying to make a living as a musician. “I got caught up in the forest, hangin’ with the trees. Realised I’m less important, than I thought I’d be.”

Find My Way Back by Eric Arjes – I always like to end with a love song and when I tossed this one onto the list, it stuck. Toni and Ned have reached their happily ever after. Squee!


I hope you enjoyed listening to the soundtrack for Bona Fide Fake! If you’d like to hear any of my other soundtracks, you can find them on Spotify.

My Favourite Books of 2021

Every January, I like to take a moment to revisit the books I read for the first time in the previous year (they may have been published in a different year) and pick my favourites. I’ve had the pleasure of reading some wonderful books over the past 12 months, so picking a handful has been tough, but here they are:

My Favourite Book of 2021:

the boy who loved Wicked by C.P. Harris
If I could only recommend one book I read this year, it would be this one. It was the first book I read by C.P. Harris. I was already hooked (and crying, which doesn’t happen often) by the end of the prologue. I don’t usually read age-gap romance, but I could not resist that cover and decided to give it a go. It totally blew me away. Phoenix and Sebastian broke my heart over and over again as they slowly, haltingly, worked their way towards their happy ending. Amazing writing! Plus, if you’re a fool for men talking about philosophy (which I am) you will be in absolute heaven. *swoon*

My Other Favourite Books of 2021 (in no particular order):

Not So Sincerely, Yours (For Him, Book 2) by A.M. Johnson
I haven’t read the first book in this series, but I picked this second book up when it was on sale and… WOW. Again, A.M. Johnson was a ‘new to me’ author. The other books in the For Him series are now firmly on my TBR list. Ethan and Anders’ story was cleverly written and well-paced. It had plenty of laughs along with the angst and tenderness. The emails sent between the two main characters were perfect. Loved it so much!

In the Middle of Somewhere (Middle of Somewhere, Book 1) by Roan Parrish
Roan Parrish is my favourite author of all time. She’s the kind of writer I want to be when I grow up. I enjoyed all three of the books in the Middle of Somewhere series, but I think this first one is my favourite. Daniel and Rex were just beautiful together.

Ever After: A Gay Fairy Tale (Forbidden Love, Book 1) by Christina Lee and Riley Hart
The sweet romance of a fairy tale, but with lots of hot and steamy thrown in. What could possibly be better than this? Add a prince who falls head over heels for his valet, and I was totally in love. Lee and Hart are a magical combination every time.

Virgin Flyer by Lucy Lennox
This was a couple who had sex before they ever spoke a word to each other. In fact, that was entirely the point. Their story was sweet and romantic (despite the less than traditional way they began) and I was enamoured with them from start to finish. Runner up favourite (because I can’t bare not to mention it): Say You’ll Be Nine, also by Lucy.

Charisma Check (Roll for Love, Book 2) by Charlie Novak
Charlie Novak is the third ‘new to me’ author to make it to the list. This book was all kinds of fun. Comic cons, costumes, hate sex, and forced proximity. What’s not to love? Also, I’d been binging Castlevania on Netflix and this book was like watching two of the lead characters (Alucard and Trevor) get it on. I was absolutely 100% into that! 🙂

Moon Flower (Fated, Book 1) by Christina Lee
Soft bois in a fantasy setting. That’s pretty much all you need to know. Soft bois, everywhere. Galen and Azriel needed to be together. The fact that they found a safe place to live out their happily every after made me so relieved. A different and refreshing story.

Wrath by Elle James
This was a monster of a book. The author admits at the back that she would have turned it into two books if she’d realised it was going to be so long. And yet, in no way did it feel too long. Josh and Ezra were a complicated, but devoted, couple. They were co-dependent in a way I found unhealthy at times, which managed to put me off and pull me in deeper at the same time. Because angst = gah! Ultimately, it was a great book that spanned multiple years and left me completely satisfied at the end.

If you missed any of these amazing stories on your book travels, I highly recommend each and every one.